This Is Spinal Tap 'Smell the Glove' None-More-Black Tee

There’s no doubt: the interwebs are lousy with $8 tees printed on cellophane from the same place that makes everything Temu sells. Ours are 100% pre-shrunk cotton (a few colors, like Sport Grey and the heathers, are cotton/poly blends), and midweight – a solid 5.0–5.3 oz, which means they’re sturdy, soft, comfortable, and don’t feel like you’re wearing a box on one hand - or the scratchy tissue from the box on the other. Think of these as the classic tee: relaxed through the body, but not boxy, getting better with each wash. But no, it’s not a $105 designer tee to wear on the red carpet, ya prima donna.

Our secret for keeping prices low? Simple: We’re not robber barons. We’re a small company trying to do something cool. We have to make a living but we don’t have to make a killing, so we keep our margins really thin, our marketing and operations smart but inexpensive, and hope you’ll join us for the ride.

Time to let your OCD shine, my friend! With every, single wash, flip that baby inside out, use cold water regardless of the shirt color, and tumble dry slow and low. Or ignore it all and throw it in with all your other stuff (we know you’re gonna). What do we care? We’re not your mom. But just so you know, she says that if you want the print to stay crisp longer, the inside-out thing is the way to go. She also says, “Hi.”

That's a no go, friend. Limited Time Pricing makes it impossible for us to make this one work (every tee is printed to order just for you, so there's no rack of spares to swap it for, and a shirt coming back is a shirt nobody else can buy). Unfortunately, we don't accept returns or exchanges for size or preference. Please, for the love of all that's holy and unholy, use the Size Guide before ordering.

That would suck and be rare - but it happens. If there's a manufacturing defect or misprint, email us within 5 days of delivery with a photo. We'll replace or refund it.

Sorry, Charlie. Once you click that buy button, Pandora down in fulfillment ain't never gonna get everything back in the box. But for real, we can't change or cancel your order once you've submitted it. Double-check everything before you checkout. Have you checked our Size Guide?

Most orders arrive 3–8 business days after processing (which takes about 1-3 days). During holidays, allow us some additional time, just in case. But real talk, most of the time, you'll get the goods in 4-5 days. Just don't be disappointed if it's more than that.

Yes...for now. To keep prices low, this is how we make it work. The great news though is we pick apparel that fits comfortably on everyone. You just have to size it right. Which means, and we know you've had to hear it a few times now but some people still ain't listening: Check 👏 the 👏 Size 👏 Guide on each product page.